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i havent written for a while, sorry about that. but last week i had Isaac and hazel give their eulogies in front of me. it was actually pretty entertaining, being able to interrupt and correct them made me pretty happy, as happy as i could be during one of the saddest things ever. i know normal people would never want to do that and hear what they have to say but why not? its like i got to hear what they had to say and their opinions on me, they were giving their eulogies for me and not for the people at my funeral. Hazel said i gave her forever within the numbered days, thats pretty awesome because even though i didnt get that huge impact i always wanted to make, i made one on her and i love her. its kind of weird i feel like some how ill have more time and things will get better i know i made a big deal about the prefuneral but this gut feeling is really good actually. Anyway theres this hoop at the hospital here downstairs, and i went down there and shot a little from my chair it w
its back, the cancer is back. ive known for a little while no but i dont wanna talk much about it, hazel doesnt even know. i just thought id tell you.
Peter Van Houten was mad at us.. and it wasnt like a mad at the world kind of mad. it seemed really personal for some reason, like he was really mad at me and Hazel. i was trying to figure out why but i havent come up with anything yet. such a weird feeling, trying to shake it though.
wow, i have a lot to tell you. So we went to amsterdam, it was absolutely amazing and it was really cool being there because i had never been out of the country. i really love traveling and im so happy i got to do it. Peter Van Houten was awful, i dont even want to talk about that. so ridiculous. we had a good time though. a really good time if you know what i mean… even though it was kinda weird, and i got all tangled in the wires. but i really cant complain cause it was pretty great. and it finally happend. thank goddddd. but really, I do love Hazel Grace. all her flaws and imperfections. im even starting to fall in love with the way she whines, and trust me i never ever thought id say that. she needs to stop feeling bad for herself, its kind of lame, its time to just live life and see where it takes you. im looking forward to more good memories to come
I wanted to do something special for Hazel and so i did. I found the author of AIA, peter van something. i got a response and im pretty happy because now she thinks im some sort of super hero for finding him. Im really liking her, i feel like im helping her, and im helping myself and were both happy about it, and i thnk we really like each other. from the first day we meant it was like we kind of already knew each other. i think thats a good quality to have in a relationship.